Monday, Monday

July 29, 2008 at 2:30 am | Posted in Uncategorized | 32 Comments

I’m so incredibly sorry I’ve been slacking off in writing. I realize some people do check this every day and that only adds to my guilt for not leaving SOMETHING new here on a daily basis. I don’t know if it’s the heat, my hormones, my poor diet, my love life, the daily hell of remodeling or a combination of all of it, but I’m just feeling really, really down. 

You know that feeling of just wanting to go home? “There’s no place like home.” “Home is where the heart is.” You know that feeling you get after having the worst day ever of just walking in your front door and feeling like the weight of the world has just been lifted from your shoulders? Well, I don’t have that right now. I come home and I want to cry. I have no place to go where I feel like I can just BE. And I know this is temporary and I know I’m going to absolutely love it when it’s all done, but I just want to hibernate until this is all over.

Today, they were messing around with the electricity and the refrigerator went out. Of course, I didn’t notice until the entire freezer was in a puddle. I got them to fix that, but tonight I noticed the dryer’s not working. And the air conditioner is out in two rooms of my house. And the lights aren’t working in the hallway or in the laundry room. And the doorbell doesn’t work. And according to the calendar I was given, we’re at least a full week behind schedule and we’re only just beginning the fourth week. What have I done? Wasn’t my house fine before? And I have no one to blame but myself. I was stupid enough to want a prettier house. I should’ve just moved. It’s all my fault. I’ve had a headache for three days straight. Never, ever again will I pull a stunt like this. And I’m sorry to write about it, but that’s what my whole life is about right now. And I also realize I’m absolutely no fun to be around, so nobody needs to point that out, either.

I just want to curl up in the dark with a bag of potato chips and a two liter bottle of diet Pepsi and watch a Project Runway marathon. But that’s not going to happen anytime soon so I’m just going to go take some more Ibuprofen and try to have a sweet dream. I’m really, really sorry I can’t be uplifting right now. But I felt more guilty about not writing anything at all, so that’s what I’ve got. Maybe tomorrow I’ll just post pictures. Or a video. Yeah….I need to get Andrew to edit a video of Emma Kelly at the beach and I’ll get him to post that.

XO
Kellie

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  1. Kellie you can’t always have good things that are going on w/ you to talk about. If your friends & fans can’t understand that then I feel sorry for them. I hope things get better for you & hang in there! Emma Kelly is growing up so fast, she is just precious!! Love ya, Judie

  2. I hope things with the house calm down soon. And I guess the only piece of wisdom comes from your own words, “keep looking up, because that is where it all is!”

    Things will get better…go get a mani/pedi tomorrow those are deff the cure for the blues! : )

  3. Sorry to hear you are having a rough time of it right now. Hang in there girl, we love you! Tomorrow is another day, and hopefully a brighter one.

  4. It’s OK Kellie! Blogs are about posting what is going on with you and how you’re seeing the world right now. It’s not always sunshine and daffodils! Remember, this too shall pass. Labor isn’t fun either but then you get that sweet baby and forget about the hard stuff. Your house will be fantastic!…..eventually.

  5. kelly can i have your old furniture newly divorced left with nothing

  6. Hey Kellie,
    Sorry you’re feeling so down. I’ve been there. Go ahead and eat that whole stinking bag of potato chips. There’s something theraputic about that. Have you thought of just trying something totally outrageous? For me it’s Roller Derby. Don’t you dare so you’re too old….I’m 47. It’s great exercise so I don’t feel so guilty about the half carton of ice cream I ate the other day, learning to block and slam people can really help with getting aggressions out, and the best part is, you can be anonymous. You can use roller derby name, and just, as you put it..”be”. No judgements, or criticism, even if you can’t skate. 🙂
    Hang in there!

  7. I know how you feel about everything being in shambles at your house. You are a brave person for staying in the house. I know it would be expensive, but I know I would go and stay in one of those extended stay hotels. They have everything you might need. Small kitchen etc. It might give you some sort of peace of mind to not have to actually live in the mess !!

  8. As much as it sucks for you to be so down, it is kinda nice to be able to read about somebody who feels about as crappy as I do! I hope things get better for you!!! I agree with Karma, that it’s good to find an out and maybe that right now should be outside of the house. Thanks for keeping up writing even when you don’t feel like it because I’m definitely one who enjoys reading how things are going for you! Hope you feel better!

  9. Tell me about it girlfriend! My husband and I started a remodeling project on my kitchen/dining room…..IN FEBRUARY!!! We are do-it-yourselfers, so it will take us alot longer, but I do know how you feel about your house being in such a state…..it makes me feel like it’s a metaphor for my life right now! I have finally accepted that it is just a mess right now, and quit putting off our social lives cause I don’t want anyone to see the mess….and guess what??? Nobody minds! It is the act of just being together and having fun that counts, not how great the house looks………(for now!). Good luck Kellie, It will be sooooo worth it when it is finished!

  10. We girls have to stick together! We’ve all felt like Kellie does right now, and we’ll all feel like that again, someday. Just the nature of the beast. The good news, it does pass, and we do feel better, eventually. Hang in there Kellie. Things will turn around and you’ll start to feel like yourself again. Sounds like you’re battling a bit of depression – it happens. You’re just in a bit of a rut, but you won’t stay there forever.
    Take care of yourself!

  11. Hang in there Kellie!! When I’m having a rough time…I look at this quote, which has been my favorite for years!

    “Friends…
    Are the quiet Angels who lift us to our feet
    when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly”

    Chin up!!

  12. Hey Kellie it could be worse. We are having our bathroom remodeled not for the first time but for the second and it has now been since last October. Our first contractor was so bad (Don Anderson) that our whole bathroom shower was falling apart within weeks, tiles falling off the walls and the floor came completely up. We discovered that after hiring a new contractor that the old one used all “leftover” parts for the bathroom including the shower pan that was spliced in 3 pieces- can we say major leakage! We have had to have all new pipes and everything installed. I feel your pain and hope yours gets better. On the up side it sounds like Big Al has a couple of houses that are empty, maybe you could “borrow” one of his for the next several weeks. Hang in there.

  13. Kellie, i am a kitchen and bath designer and i work with people everyday who have a torn up kitchen. If they said 6 weeks to be done for example tell youreself 8. The sad thing about construction is you work with humans and anything can go wrong ANYTHING. Leave them something to munch on every once in a while and they will end up going an extra mile for you. I promise. Contractors want to get the job done too and get paid but if you are nice, believe me you are making friends with people that can definately help you out in the future. Our sheetrockers who did our house had to come back a year later because we had a leak in the roof and had to replace a bunch of sheetrock and they did it for free, all because we were “good to them” A little extra kindness in your time of stess is definately noticed. I do feel for you it is a nightmare. But you will only do it once remember. If you add 2 weeks on to what they say as your secret you will be much happier! Just think at least it will be done for Christmas!! hahahah Goodluck girl! can’t wait to see the results as a designer!

  14. Hang in there! We love you and feel your pain. No one knows that remodeling is so disruptive to your life until it is well underway and too late! My daughter just survived hers and had a beautiful house. I say throw Al in with Redneck Steve and take over his house!

  15. […] Monday, Monday I’m so incredibly sorry I’ve been slacking off in writing. I realize some people do check this every day […] […]

  16. One word Kellie… CHOCOLATE!

  17. Kellie,
    Thanks for being honest about your feelings. I have had a horrible last couple of weeks at work and really stressed out! One employee started alot of trouble and I lost my whole crew and I am left trying to figure out how I am going to do all this work alone. No one has applied for my openings. It helps to know I am not the only person that gets stressed out and wants to eat everything in sight and all of it.

  18. Can’t you move into one of those residence hotels for a while? Or what about Al’s house…isn’t he moving out soon? Maybe at least a fancy, smancy hotel for a weekend every now and then. Otherwise I say give into the whole potato chip thing. You know how to lose it when you want to!!

  19. Oh Kellie,
    REMODLING: It has to get SO BAD before it gets better. It’s sorta like being pregnant and going into labor. While you’re going through it, it’s awful, but once it’s over, you’ll think, “It wasn’t so bad after all.” (At least I hope that’s how you feel about it!)
    My husband and I are “DIY” people and we’ve done several projects in our house and it’s awful going through it, but you’ll be okay. You’re tough, and I must say: for someone who is miserable, you do a great job of showing it on your job! That’s often hard to do, but you seem so “fine” on the air.

    Enjoy DJ School, and just make those other diva-wanna-be’s wish they’d never heard the name Kellie Freakin Rasberry!

  20. Hey Kellie! Missed ya’ll “live” today; so I searched the website hoping nothing major was wrong….THANK GOD there wasn’t. Anyways, you are an awesome chick and I love hearing you talk! Don’t feel bad about the way you are feeling we all have our “sluggish” moments in life; just remember this too shall pass! Hope you have an awesome time at DJ school!

  21. Kelly! This is YOUR blog and we are YOUR fans, so we will listen throgh the good and bad times! By the way, you looked amazing the other night at the House of Blues. I went up the bar to see if I could meet you but I only saw Al and JC and although I love them too I was hoping to meet you! But I never saw you again : ( Anyway, hope you start to feel better soon. It can only get better, right?

  22. Hi! I work for a company that provides temporary housing. We can set you and Emma Kelly up in a really nice apt, fully furnished, full amenities, cable, internet, phone and full size washer dryer while you are waiting for your house to be completed. We do have a 30 stay required. We really can help enjoy coming home in a temporary home until your home is fixed! Give us a call 972-258-9900.

  23. I am worried about you Kellie! You just spent so much time and effort losing weight and you keep talking about eating your problems away. Don’t give in!! It will just make you feel worse in the long run.

    I have loser, eat in my car by myself days too…good to know I am not the only one.

    LOVE YOU!! Chin up girl!

  24. I’m assuming watching “The Money Pit” isn’t a good idea??

    OK…that was a joke!

  25. I’m thinking you should take two days and go to a hotel to just “be” I know it isn’t home. But take Emma Kelly she’ll love the swim and you’ll love that there are no ladders. Stay at a Drury Inn if you have one around, they have a GREAT breakfast buffet (No, I don’t work there/stay there/own stock there lol) It’s worth getting up for in the morning, and it isn’t a pricey hotel either…so you could stay for two or three nights. Just a suggestion to help you keep the sanity!! Plus, in the end, it’s still going to be better then moving and you do deserve a pretty house!!

  26. I know exactly how you feel about wanting that place to go and have a sense of home and relaxation. Eventually it’s going to look amazing, you’re going to feel amazing, and it’s going to be 150% worth it. One day you’ll be able to laugh about it, but I do wish you all the luck with this “adventure” you’re going through.

  27. Wow, diet pepsi and project runway marathon! Wow..I thought I was th only one who did that when they were depressed. My mother just went through a pretty big home makeover and it near drove her nuts (she spent a lot of time at my house). I think the best advice I can give you is to just get out of the house more often. It will keep your mind off of things. Trust, me you will love it when it’s all done. God Bless!

  28. Kellie instead of binging on potato chips and diet pepsi… try going for a run or doing something productive that will be healthy for you.

  29. I so feel the same way right now, although i just had a hysterectomy 2 weeks ago. My girls made some chocolate chip cookies, which i nearly ate all of and watched a Mad Men marathon. If you feel like crying just do it, i would right now if it didn’t hurt so much.

  30. Hey Kellie- we just did a little remodel- carpet to slate tile floors and painting. I told hubby from the getgo- I am moving out. I cannot deal with floor and paint issues and be able to work my regular job- so just figure the cost of a hotel room into the remodel budget. It was worth it and I wouldn’t do it any other way!!

  31. Hey Kellie! I hope you get to feeling better. You should take your little girl away on a staycation when you get back from DJ school. I hear the great wolf lodge is really fun.

    Don’t worry about eating the chips because you’re a total hottie. I’ve dug you since I was 13.. so that’s like 16 years and you’re still hot!

  32. I check this blog everyday and i’m about to stop coming to this site anymore. If the people on the show aren’t going to even update, why don’t they get rid of the blog section all together?


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