delicious word of the day — “quagmire”

March 28, 2008 at 2:08 am | Posted in Uncategorized | 91 Comments




THE most important thing I had to do today was meet Ashtyn Lynn Lowe! Amy had her baby around 9:30 this morning and everybody’s doing great! Ashtyn is 6 lbs., 13 oz. and she has a head full of dark hair and full lips and the most perfect little nose. Just precious. Can’t believe she’s actually here already! I’m taking Emma Kelly up to meet her tomorrow. I HOPE she’s in a good mood because I will have my camera battery fully charged and ready for action.

Trainer Chad gave me these wonderful printouts so I can go armed and ready into the grocery store to stock up on the right amounts of protein and good carbs. But I haven’t actually had the opportunity to make it to market just yet. Life gets in the way of trying to do good sometimes. But I have every intention of going….maybe Saturday. I’m really busy tomorrow doing more good deeds. But in the meantime, I’m eating better than I was. I just so happened to have some chicken breast in the house and I’ve got bags and bags of frozen vegetables from those other times I was going to be a good girl. I know some people are mad at me — actually, it’s more like one person in particular who keeps posting under different names and then agreeing with herself. But I think it’s sort of funny, don’t you? Anyway, I know there’s more than just this Dawn/Eve/Kennedy/Darcy person who hates me. Oh, and I can’t forget that Linda chick who hates me for being a bad mom, but I’m sure she hates me for a myriad of other reasons, too,  including my weight obsession. Eh. They’re not the ones sitting here typing on a computer while her upper abdomen spills helplessly over her jeans. Being 5′ 9.5″ and 143 would be a fabulous weight for me. And it’s only 10 freaking pounds. MY 10 freaking pounds! And I’m so thankful that I only need to lose 10 pounds instead of the 60-plus I once did many years ago. I know I’ve come a long way. Yea me! But I have a belly and it bothers me and I’m going to do something about it. I’m not sticking my finger down my throat. I’m not popping laxatives or diuretics. I’m not starving. I’m eating healthier and doing pilates. I want add in getting on the treadmill and jogging a few times a week. I’m trying to do this the right way and hopefully I’ll be rewarded with a body that I can be proud to show in Mexico. But gosh darn it, if you’re 10, 20, 30 or more pounds overweight and you’re in love with yourself the way you are, then good for you! But I would like to experience a moment in my life where I come close to having a flat tummy. You’re going to hate me for THAT? There are MUCH more interesting things to hate me for. Trust me!



delicious word of the day — “Leslie”

March 26, 2008 at 3:54 am | Posted in Uncategorized | 52 Comments

Breathe in. Breathe out. Cumbayah. Mama Say Mama Sa Mama Cu Sa. It’s not me; it’s you.

So, I’ve gotten myself roped in to this ridiculous bathing suit bet. Lose 10 pounds by the Friday before Memorial Day weekend or my bikini shot is posted on the internet for all the world to see. Actually, it will be a tankini shot. I don’t own a bikini and haven’t owned one since I was approximately 6 and I wasn’t about to buy one just for this picture that will hopefully never see the light of day. I hate this so much.

So I knew I was going to have my body fat taken today, so I went home from work and took a nice, long, hot bath and shaved my legs. I didn’t know exactly how personal this caliper thing was going to be, so better to be safe than sorry. But I must say I was pleasantly surprised. I’m at 19.7 percent. For my age, I’m right where I’m supposed to be for health purposes. For wearing a bathing suit in front of your co-workers while on vacation in Mexico? Hell to the no!

Trainer Chad — who is very cute, by the way, if anybody’s got “cuteness” on their list of what they’re looking for in a personal trainer — says I have to eat 1464 calories a day, divided up between 6 meals. Each meal must be 40% protein, 50% carbs, and 10% fat. I have to eat every 2-3 hours and I can’t go longer than 3 hours, 15 minutes between meals. He wants me to have my first meal by 5am. This means if I eat every 3 hours, I will be wrapping up my food-a-palooza each night around 8. How am I going to do this?? I’m going to have to carry a refrigerator around with me! And the calculations I have to make. Ugh! I’m too lazy for this. I just want to stop eating, which he assures me will completely backfire…but what does HE know! I’m just kidding. I know he knows. I’M the one who doesn’t have a clue.

I also went and re-signed back up at the gym, where I plan to follow Uncle Daddy’s suggestion and “Get on the treadmill and run your ass off!” He’s so cute…And I’ve got pilates twice a week, so that’s set. I’m also going to go back to that core fusion class and sign up for some of those. Overkill is the name of the game here, people.

The bad part is, Uncle Daddy is finally coming over tomorrow night so I can cook for him. The plan calls for my mama’s macaroni and cheese, but now I can’t eat any of it!! He says he won’t eat it if I’m not eating it…So unless I cave, we’re going to be sitting there staring at a big pile of ooey gooey goodness and denying ourselves the pleasure that is hot cheese on a plate…


delicious word of the day — “superfluous”

March 25, 2008 at 2:02 am | Posted in Uncategorized | 44 Comments

When I got home from my first day back at work today, Emma Kelly had just gone down for her nap. I seized the opportunity and climbed underneath the sheets of my unmade bed to close my eyes for a  while, too. Two hours later — yea! — she woke up in a great mood.  We played for a little while and she had her snack time, and then we bundled up and headed out the door to the grocery store — or as Emma Kelly sees it, her personal performance stage.

She puts on such a show. She smiles and waves and says “Hi!” to everybody who catches  her eye. But I don’t get some people. Here you’ve got about the cutest thing you’ve seen all day trying to get your attention and chirping “Hi!” at you, and would you believe that some people actually blow her off? They completely ignore her preciousness. Is life really that bad for some people? REALLY? 

So we get home and I’m putting away groceries and Emma Kelly’s wearing these new shoes with rubber soles that apparently are giving her a bit of difficulty because she leaves the kitchen and rounds the corner into the living room and BAM!!! She smashes face-first into the ceramic tile flooring, blood trickling from both nostrils. My poor baby! I came running from the kitchen and Nanny Laura came running from the hallway, and do you know what? Emma Kelly didn’t want me. My heart just sank to my stomach. I’m dabbing blood from her nose and she’s clinging to Laura, who must’ve sensed my aching need to comfort my daughter because she offered to let me hold her, but I was like, if Emma Kelly is getting her comfort from someone or something else, then I just need to do what helps her get through the trauma of this moment. Still didn’t stop my feelings from getting a little hurt. What mommy doesn’t want her kid to reach up for her when something’s wrong? And what kind of mommy am I that my baby doesn’t want me to make her feel better……..Very depressing.  I was so upset I polished off a heap of Chinese leftovers and now there’s a slab of poundcake still waiting with my name on it.


delicious word of the day — “diphthong”

March 24, 2008 at 2:48 am | Posted in Uncategorized | 48 Comments

I am not sure that I spent my vacation time as well as I could have. In fact, I’m sure I didn’t. I had all these grandiose plans of getting my closet organized and doing my taxes and cleaning out clutter and so on and so forth, and I did absolutely nothing except run around the first half of the week getting ready for J-Si’s birthday party and the second half of the week recovering from it. But it was worth it. J-Si had fun. We all had fun. Uncle Daddy’s just so stinking cute. Sigh.

And then my romantic notions of spending the Easter holiday engulfed in the love of my daughter went out the window when she woke up cranky butt and stayed that way pretty much the entire day. I don’t know what phase this is she’s going through, but it’s frustrating. Maybe it’s just called the “17 months old” phase. She’s just into EVERYTHING and whatever you have, she wants. And I think the hardest part for her is the communication. I can tell she completely understands what I’m saying to her, and when she tries to speak to me, I can tell she completely makes sense in her own head. But it’s still coming out of her mouth as gobbledy goop and when she gets completely frustrated that Mommy’s not comprehending, she lets out a scream and then opens her mouth and bites. Yes, we have a biter, ladies and gentleman. And when she took a hunk out of her mommy’s thigh the other day, Emma Kelly got her first swat on the bottom.  That went down in the baby journal, fo sho.

But it’s not just people biting. If she’s frustrated with ANYTHING, she bites it. If I’m not untying her double-knotted shoe lace fast enough (Thanks, Freddie…) she picks up her foot and bites her shoe. If I’m not getting her shirt over her head fast enough, she bites that, too.  How do you break them of that? I had a cousin who would bite her kid back. I’m not doing that…I’m thinking it’s something that will just pass once she can use her words better. Am I living in la-la land thinking that way?

Well, it’s back to work tomorrow. I’m actually looking forward to seeing everybody, so that’s a good sign, right?


My Mama’s Peppered Corn Casserole

March 18, 2008 at 10:28 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | 64 Comments

You’re going to thank me for this one….

 1 8oz. package creamed cheese, cubed

1/3 cup butter

3 cans Mexicorn, drained

1 small can of diced green chilis OR 2-4 jalapeno peppers, seeded and minced (depends on how hot you want this thing)

In a saucepan over low heat, cook and stir the creamed cheese and butter until smooth. Stir in the corn and chilis (or peppers). Pour into an ungreased casserole and bake uncovered at 350 for 15-20 minutes or until bubbly. 

My Mama’s Meatloaf

March 14, 2008 at 12:40 am | Posted in Uncategorized | 83 Comments

While he has yet to make it for me, Uncle Daddy swears his mama’s meatloaf is the best EVER. But he won’t divulge the recipe. I am a far more generous spirit when it comes to matters of the stomach, so here is MY mama’s recipe for meatloaf:

2 eggs

3/4 cup milk

2/3 cup finely crushed saltines

1/2 cup chopped onions

1 tsp. salt


1 1/2 lbs. ground beef

1 cup ketchup (Heinz is the best)

1/2 cup firmly packed dark brown sugar

1 tsp. worcestershire sauce

In a large bowl, beat the eggs with a fork. Add milk, saltines, onion, salt and pepper. Add ground beef and mix well. Shape into a loaf and place in a shallow, ungreased baking pan. Combine ketchup, brown sugar and worcestershire sauce and spoon 3/4 of this over the meatloaf. Bake at 350 degrees for 60-65 minutes until no pink remains. Drain the pan. Let stand 10 minutes before slicing. Serve with the remaining sauce.

delicious word of the day — worcestershire

March 13, 2008 at 3:51 am | Posted in Uncategorized | 32 Comments

Hey, if ya’ll want more of my mama’s recipes, I am happy to oblige. Yes, if you eat everything she makes, you will develop the same hate for your bathroom scale that I have lived with these many years. But food is love, people. Food is love. And if you manage to add in a stick of butter somewhere, well that’s just ecstasy.  I’ll be honest, I’m not a cook. I can follow a recipe, but I just don’t want to. But I still have every intention of making that macaroni and cheese for Uncle Daddy. However, I know once I do that, he’ll be so bloated up that he won’t feel like kissing on me. And I’m still digging the kissing parts too much to load him up on carbs and cheese right now! But I’ll give in eventually. You gotta make them think you’ve got SOME domestic skills.

My friend Christy and I went for a ridiculously long walk today on this jogging/biking/rollerblading/walking trail. Seriously, and I say this in all serious seriousness, every single girl should get her butt out there on the trail immediately. I have never in my life seen so many drop-dead gorgeous men in one place, just passing us by, one after another! I don’t know what you’re supposed to do to actually get them to stop mid-run and talk to you, but that’s your problem. I’m just telling you where to find them! I told Christy I should print up a T-shirt that says “I know I’m pushing a baby stroller, but…” Yeah, I’m thinking if you’re cruising the jogging path to meet single guys, single moms might want to find a babysitter for the afternoon.  

Anyway, I’ll peruse the book full of recipes Mama gave me and I’ll have something good for you soon. Maybe I’ll give you the meatloaf next, since I had a request for that. Oh! And if she hasn’t given me her potato salad recipe, I’ll get that one, too!!


My Mama’s Macaroni and Cheese!!!

March 11, 2008 at 2:34 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | 31 Comments

My Mama’s Macaroni and Cheese

1 16 oz. pkg. macaroni noodles, cooked in salted water

1 pint of heavy whipping cream

At least 1 lb of medium cheddar cheese

about 1/2 lb. of muenster cheese

3 eggs, beaten up in the whipping cream

about 1/2 stick of butter….butter is better than margarine

Boil the macaroni until tender. Taste it, and if it’s too salty, just rinse the noodles under running water right in the colander.

Melt a couple of tablespoons of butter in the bottom of your casserole, and put one layer of noodles in. Layer about 1/2 of the cheddar cheese, muenster cheese and a few pats of butter on this layer. Put another layer of noodles and then another layer of cheese and a few pats of butter. Mix the eggs up with the cream and pour over the entire casserole. Dot with any additional butter on top.

Bake uncovered at 375 for about 20 minutes and check it. Slide the back of a spoon down one side of the casserole, and it should be congealed….not runny at all. If it’s still runny, continue to bake and check it about every 5 minutes until you get the custardy consistancy. Serve hot….if you wait until the cheese cools off it’s not nearly as good.

delicious word of the day — “shenanigans”

March 11, 2008 at 2:19 am | Posted in Uncategorized | 48 Comments

A few questions answered and then I have one for YOU!

My daughter’s polka dot outfit was given to her by the wonderful Noelle at for her first birthday, and when she outgrows it, I’m going to order another one! The bow came from her, too. Pirate Booty is this puffed corn stuff that Emma Kelly can eat because it’s like popcorn without the kernels for her to choke on. I cannot stop eating the Veggie Booty!!! And the Fruity Booty!!! Believe it or not, as  much as I love me some cheese, the White Cheddar Booty is my least favorite. My sweater was Calvin Klein and I like it. And what else…………..I can’t think of what else ya’ll asked right now. But! I have a question!! Does anybody know where I can buy canned boiled peanuts in the Dallas area? I googled it,  but — believe it or not! — nothing showed up!! Shocking, I know. I really need them by Friday, so if you can help this Southern sister out, I’d really appreciate it. I’ll buy a case or two of them. Seriously.

Man, I turned around and the day was over! I had this list of things to do today and I actually checked off about five of them.  Of course, it was mostly the piddly stuff and  nothing important like, oh….doing my taxes or setting up that appointment to get my will done.  I can’t keep procrastinating on that, either. You hate to think of that stuff, but I’m supposed to be this responsible parent person now and it’s just so overwhelming sometimes. And when I get overwhelmed, I completely shut down and do nothing, which is exactly the opposite of what I SHOULD be doing. That’s why my closet still isn’t cleaned out. It’s too overwhelming. That’s why my one junk drawer slowly grew into THREE junk drawers. And now it’s too overwhelming. That’s why I have shoeboxes full of pictures that still need to be put into photo albums. It’s too overwhelming! So it all just sits there and I feel bad about it. And THAT, my friend, is another one of the many reasons I am finally starting to read that book Oprah told us we all ought to be reading and why I’m going to have to sit my butt down in front of the computer and play catch up with that online course she’s conducting. That book is going to solve EVERYTHING. I can just feel it! I mean, I liked that Eat, Love, Pray book just fine and there was a page or two that brought me to tears, but by the end of it, I was kind of over it. And now I’m hoping that this next  book is going to be like manna sent from Heaven and meant just for little old me.  I’m moving in the right direction, but I just need to go ahead and GET there, you know?

Otherwise, I think I’m doing pretty good. I’m up a few pounds, but eh. I’ll lose those same five pounds and maybe I’ll gain them back again in a month or two. I’m not too terribly obsessed about it right now. As a matter of fact, I’m planning on cooking up some of my mama’s homemade macaroni and cheese for Uncle Daddy, just to prove that I can cook if I really WANT to. And it’s not like I’m going to sit there and not eat it. And what’s another couple pounds…Eh.


delicious word of the day — “Tuaca”

March 10, 2008 at 1:34 am | Posted in Uncategorized | 34 Comments

What a weekend! I guess I should say, What a Saturday! Quite frankly, Friday night and Sunday sort of sucked. But Saturday was cool.

We found out Barney was going to be at the toy store doing pictures with kids, so we went up there to do that. Amy brought Ayden, who LOVES Barney and I wasn’t so sure Emma Kelly would get it. I mean, she’s SEEN Barney, but we don’t really put it on for her that much. And remembering how she freaked out with Santa Claus who’s just a guy with a beard and a hot red suit, I wasn’t so sure she’d be able to handle Barney and all his purpleness. SHE FREAKING LOVED HIM. I swear, she was just about to explode all over the place! But it was cute and fabulous and I know she won’t remember it but we got a really cool picture to remind her about it one day. (If you click on it, it’ll get bigger.)


 And since Amy’s been dying to meet “Uncle Daddy” and she’s about to bust out a baby any minute now, we arranged for a little double date for Saturday night which ended up with everybody being invited, seven showing up, and Amy and Uncle Daddy sitting as far as physically possible away from each other. They ended up not getting to know each other AT ALL, but at least Amy and Kinsey seemed to hit it off, so all was not a complete loss. And we had a fun waiter who never would bring me anything I wanted because he knew what he wanted me to have was better. And he ended up being right, so it was cool. I said, “I’ll have an apple martini, please.” And he said, “No, I think I’ll bring you something better.” And he did! Then I said, “I’ll have another one of that drink you picked for me instead of dessert,  please.” And he said, “No, I’ll bring you something even better.” And he did! And when Amy tried to order chocolate cake, he said no. He didn’t think the chocolate cake was any good. But she is stubborn and she is pregnant and she ordered it anyway. Guess what? He was right! And now he’s my new favorite waiter ever.  Amy might not have fallen in love with Uncle Daddy but I fell in love with my waiter man.

Then we dumped the pregnant chick and we all went over to a comedy club where we watched a room full of people try really hard to laugh at a comedian who wasn’t that funny, but when you’ve paid that much to see a comedian perform, you want to laugh, dang it!! We left before it was over and headed over to the dueling piano bar. Wow. People get really drunk at dueling piano bars, don’t they? Is that a requirement or something? I can’t explain to you what I saw and do it any justice, so I won’t. But Uncle Daddy got up there on the drums and busted out a little “Mustang Sally,” which was super cool and I’m like, Yeah…I’m with him…So that was fun. Then we went over to one more bar where we tuckered ourselves out we were home by midnight or so. And that was our big night out. Sunday was just a bunch of nothing. I had big plans of sorting through paperwork and cleaning out closets and doing all sorts of responsible stuff, but that side of me decided to go away again and I ended up watching a “Rock of Love” marathon and eating Pirate Booty all day. And let me just tell you, if you haven’t tried Pirate Booty, you don’t know what you’re missing.

This week, my goals are to actually do some of that responsible stuff I meant to do today and be a good person. Isn’t that a good goal?


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